How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

There was a black and white spotted dog named Louis. Why did they call her that? Because, that's what they named her.

Whats smarter you or the person writing this? -The answer is that i said whats smarter not whose smarter so I am smarter because you had no clue this was point less pie

Whats the easiest way to get a dumb blond to have sex with you? rape.

So 3 Jews walk into a bar, I lied, it was a gas chamber.

What's red but smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

Two blondes and a brunnett walk into a bar. Remarkably, there was nothing else notable about any of them.

Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

A man walks into bar and orders a drink. The bartender says " Hey I saw a bunch of men coming in and out of your house while you were on vacation last week." The man replied " I know. That's because my wife is a prostitute."

If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

Two Black men, one wearing a blue shirt, and one wearing a red shirt, Jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The one in the blue shirt

Students, please find the surface integral.

What's a cow's fovorite vacation spot? Farmyard animals do not receive vacations, they have long hours, no pay, and get eaten upon death.

Oh no! I forgot the milk!

How are cars made? By magic.

What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house Purple because ice cream dosnt have bones

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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