Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

whats green at the bottom of a hole and covered in cookie crumbs a girl scout run over by a truck

Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

Some people like melon and others like soup.

Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

Last night, I awoke to the unsettling sound of an alarm. My initial thought was fire. However, after analyzing the situation, I realized that it was only my alarm clock. I turned off the alarm clock, and got out of bed. Then my brother walked in my room and hit me in the face with a toaster.

Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

Here's another:

racism...deal with it!

What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

3.14159365358979323846264

How many ADD teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? Most likely only one. With advances in modern medicine, adolescents are experiencing large improvements in their abilities to focus on things from schoolwork to lightbulb changing!

When life gives you lemons, sell them. Rejoice in your free money.

... Chan chan

whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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