So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

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In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

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Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

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why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

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What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

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Getting an STD. What's worse than mixing up the order of the joke and the punchline?

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Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

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How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

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What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

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Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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