Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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What/s funnier than 24 dead Jews? 25 dead Jews. What/s funnier than 25 dead Jews? 6 million dead Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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ronald wants to join a gym, they tell him to lose 20 pounds before coming back or else.....

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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What happens when you step on Jupiter? You cannot.

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What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

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Is everything funnier when u have a vagina.

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Apple juice.

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why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

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The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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How do you fit 1000 babies into a trashcan? You don't that would be wasteful! You Eat Them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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jesus can walk on water but chuck norris can swim through land

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Why did Ian pass his CRB check? Because he committed his crimes on holiday

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Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

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xavier stop

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What's black and white and red all over? A panda with red paint splattered on it

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Knock Knock? Who's there? bob bob who? the builder

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and gets shot.

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What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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