You will not press the like button.

a blond girl walks into a bar

What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

Why did the little boy have to go to the hospital? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a train.

Roses are red, Stones are grey, This poem is obvious, You don't say??

Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

I hate it when you can't tell whether a person is male or female.

nice tits.

Q: How do you know your gay? A: When you have unexpected desires for men, which is a sin to a religion, so the choice of being gay is against the bible and you would soon be sent to the pit of fire we call hell.

Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

How did the Jew escape the concentration camp? He didn't he was caught and put in the gas chamber.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? He has flourished throughout his musical career and is a very accomplished man, as he has won many Grammys

Knock Knock.. Who's There? Boo.. Boo Who? Book...

What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

what did one swedish guy say to another swedish guy? I dont speak russian

Why did the Quantum chicken cross the road? It was already on both sides.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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