What's the difference between a bird and a pool table? Both of them fly, except for the pool table.

How many babies does it take it to feed a grown man? It depends on the size of the man, how hungry he is and how big the babies are.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have condoms, But we didn't use them with you. You were DP'd, Now you have STD.

Why did the door close? Because I closed it.

A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

what was the last pizza place the twin towers ordered from? Domino's

Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

The government

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it got stuck at a red light, it waited 5 minutes before getting frustrated and leaving. Later that day the chicken realized that it had forgotten to press the button.

Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

What did one gothic person say to another gothic person? Nothing. Gothic people only cut themselves.

Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

that feels sooooo good. -is what jacob says when his dogs hump his legs

hi my name is matt mckeon and i like renata saggy tits !!!!!

why do rednecks wear big belt buckles? it's a tombstone for a dead dick:)

How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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