Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

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Did you hear the joke about Hellen Keller? Neither did she.

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What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

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An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

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What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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What did my grandma tell me during a funeral? Nothing. It's her funeral. She's dead.

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Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as the bar was made of metal and the man made forceful contact with the bar which resulted him in saying ouch.

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whats white and pointless? chalk.

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why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

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Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

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What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

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I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Everyone in the bar is very happy for him considering he has regained the ability to walk

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Why didn't the black guy where a seat belt? I don't know but he should've because hes dead.

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Q: What do you call the first black guy who swam in the ocean? A: Triangle.

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Why did John stay home from school? He died.

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A movie trilogy about an alphabet book. A ten minute long movie about a complete lifespan. A 600 pages long book on how to stop procrastination. A two page book about the top 600 award winning pictures. CALL NOW FOR A TELESCOPE INCLUDED! (So you can see the stars and fuck the book altogether) Juggernaut: IM THE JUGGERNAUTBITCH! Me: Hi, mind if I just call you bitch for short? Your life sucks sometimes because Karma is a bitch... ...My bitch ;)

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What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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