How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

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the love boat

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

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What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

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Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

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A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

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A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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roses are red. violets are violet...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops