What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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When Miley Cyrus sticks out her tongue, people usually are there to take a photograph.

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Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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What is more boring than watching paint dry? Aids

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8

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A pedophile walks into a Nursery. He get's arrested.

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A man walks in on his wife blowing Bubbles. Two weeks later they are divorced.

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A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

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What happened after the man walked off the cliff? Nothing. It was a foot tall.

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42, that is all

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

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Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did twenty mexicans run down a hill? There was a marathon in the area.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

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What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

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What do an Eagle and a sugar cube have in common? The fact that if let to disintegrate they both turn slowly to hydrogen after a period of time.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops