What did Steven Hawking get for Christmas? ------ ------ ------ A bike.

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What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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i have to pee out my ass.

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whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "I like your shirt" The black man walked off and lived out the rest of his days in peace.

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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why did the chicken go to the man? TO ask if he wants sex for money

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How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An apple up your ass, a penis in your ramen, finding out you have herpes, or many other scenarios. In short, there are many things worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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If I met your mom before you was born, you would still be born.

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

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Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

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giddy goat

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whos the bitch now!?! you are.

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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A tree fell in the forest. The person in the house it hit heard it.

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What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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