Whats so funny? That kid has down syndrome

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I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

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A man walked into a bar. He broke his nose.

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Women's rights

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

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two cannables walk in to McDonalds

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

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Q. How do you blindfold a Chinese man? A. With a blindfold.

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A man and his son cross the street, the man hears a screaming noise and ignores it, the man gets across and notice his wife missing...

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Roses are red.. Your child is also red.. I drove my car over his face. <3

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch".

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What is the difference between a blond and a red-head? They have different hair colors.

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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Why was Timmy's hair shaved? He had cancer and was going though Chemo.

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

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A blond and a brunette are on the moon. The brunette says to the blond "I'm glad that independent company's are taking the job of American space travel."

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why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

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What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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