How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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Your mama's p*ssy is so stank, she should probably consult her physician as she may have an easily treatable infection.

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Why did the cat bite its owner's? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

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There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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?J?o?k?e?

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knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell into a well? Nothing. She died upon impact and her family mourned her death for years.

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How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

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What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

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i have read and agree to the terms of service

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What's worse than waking up with cancer? Waking up dead.

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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