roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

why did the chicken cross the bread? because chicken salad

A man walks into a bar.

Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

NEVER

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

Q- Who is the life of the party? A- hannah schane

Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

Q: What's the difference between lucky charms and a baby? A: One is magically delicious and the other is a breakfast serial.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

Butt poop.

Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw him

Why did the chicken cross the street? Because the light was red and cars had stopped.

Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...