im in stttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why wasn't the man wearing a life vest? Because he was sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

thumb_up thumb_down -40

what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

thumb_up thumb_down -40

why did the fat guy become fat ...COD..

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down -40

what do u call a kid with autism? a autistic s.o.b or Hennon bart

thumb_up thumb_down -42

"Happy Father's Day!" said the little boy to the old man. The old man broke out in tears because he had always wanted to be a father.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You write a really difficult riddle in braille and tell her to solve it.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +53

what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Old guitars sound like cat's guts

thumb_up thumb_down +43

It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why is the fat man fat? Because he has an extremly bad metabolism which makes him gain two pounds from eating one cheeseburger

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops