what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

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whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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Whats funnier than a dead baby tied to a tree? Everything, infant mortality is a very sad thing.

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I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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Hello.

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Why are black people so tall? Because their parents were

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What ended my last relationship? Oncoming traffic.

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What do u call a mixture of black people and asian people. Breakfast- Scrambled Eggs and Sausage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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