Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

why cant stephen hawking dance He does not enjoy dancing

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

Knock Knock Who's there? You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy. You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy, who?

Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

if girls witth big boobs work at hooters where does the girl with one leg work.... walmart

why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

What is old and fancy and comes in two pieces? Marie Antoinette.

Roses are red violates are blue, matty is gay, sebby is too

Roses are black, Violets are too. I'm colourblind. Stop laughing.

what do blondes and rocks have in common? they are both material and have extension.

How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

Wanna here a good joke?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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