A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

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What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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You

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Justin Bieber

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops