A man walks into bar and orders a drink. The bartender says " Hey I saw a bunch of men coming in and out of your house while you were on vacation last week." The man replied " I know. That's because my wife is a prostitute."

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? Nothing at all, except the WNBA is professional basketball players of the female sex.

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If a quiz is a quizical then what is a test? an Exam.

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

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You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

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Why is Timmy a dumbass ? He's not, because asses cannot, by definition, be intelligent, so it is unnecessary to qualify it as "dumb".

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Q: How do u make a butcher cry A: Kill its family

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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What do you get when you add a cucumber some vinegar some salt and you get..... Macaroni and cheese

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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What do you call 55,000 clowns exiting a small car? Fiction.

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A man with Alztheimers walks into a bar. He forgets the purpose of being there.

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All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

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What do you call three mexicans in a bowl of soup? Whatever their respective names might happen to be.

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What did the guy at the office order on his pizza. Pepperoni :)

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A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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Aaron Pfeifer likes men

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

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Why did Princess Diana die? Because she deserved it!

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops