Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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A man walks into a bar, a man behind him doesn't.

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you know what they say, Big man, Big hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, shame he died

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A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

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why did the black man attend the AA meeting? his wife told him the only way she would stay with him is if he would attend these meetings, he was an alcoholic and is dying of liver failure.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

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Yo mama is so ugly that the devil warships her.

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A guy starts writing a gag for a joke site. But then he couldn't think of a punchline.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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A bus with 11 passengers is making its final stops for the night. At main street it drops of 6 people and picks up 2, at broad it drops of 3 and picks up 4, at 3rd street it drops of 5 and picks up 1, and finally at 6th street it drops off 4 and picks up 0. How many people are still on the bus? 13 if you include the dead bodies in the back

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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What did Iran say to Israel? ALLLLAHH

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!!!!!!¡¡¡¡

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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