Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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A man goes to a doctor and says , "My arm hurts in 3 places." the doctor says, "Dont go to those places.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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out of your comfort zone

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A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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I was bitter, nonetheleast because you and I became friends, while someone working for you (at that time it might just as well had been you) was conducting a lot of illegal activities. I kept thinking, why does the guy call himself "the wizard", its the most used name... Why? Because it is the most used name, good luck finding "THE WIZARD" among internet nerds, but then again, if you search for the most famous one, you find "THE MAN", Not only did you tell me at first that you where Nero. Which I can prove you are not, but you know, one side of me was your friend, the other knew I would have to get rid of you no matter the cost, if you kept your activities. SImply put: When I enjoyed our time together, I pushed you away with stupid humor, small insults and etc, mostly in order to protect myself from getting to close with a potential threat for well, security, lets keep it at that.

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What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

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If a man is alone in the woods and there is no one there to tell he's wrong is he right? If a tree falls on a women.... Before we tell the rest why was there a tree I the kitchen?

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Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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how do you get your son or daughters attention? break down the door to their room and promptly begin beating them with a wooden baseball and then tie them up to a chair and torture them for 24 hours.

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Send "What Makes You Beautiful" Ringtone to your CellShowHideSong Notes - Go behind the words! You're insecure, don't know what for You're turning heads when you walk through the do-o-or Don't need make-up - to cover up Being the way that you are is eno-o-ough Everyone else in the room can see it Everyone else but you Baby you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed the way you smile at the ground, it ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! If only you saw what I could see you'd understand why I want you so desperatley Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! Read more: ONE DIRECTION - WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL LYRICS http://www.metrolyrics.com/what-makes-you-beautiful-lyrics-one-direction.html#ixzz1sJdk3KHD Copied from MetroLyrics.com

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because that's where all of the other chickens are.

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You know what is worse than being dead...being at a Justin Bieber concert

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

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Did you hear about the Englishman who ran all the way to Loch Ness? Oh, that's a shame, because I didn't either.

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When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

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Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

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weston cage

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Q:Why didn't Mr. Fuzzy have to cut his hair anymore? A: Because he was diagnosed with cancer

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The day the forces of light fight the forces of darkness, we will all live in darkness no matter who wins. Pure darkness will not allow you to see. Pure light will blind you.

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Knock Knock! Whos there? The Game!

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whats 69+2? 71

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops