How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

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what is so fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? There is a high possibility their breasts have developed, thus equaling more pleasure for you.

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what do you call a man with no friends? it's because of all the wear and tear that's done to the socks being thrown in her, and she desanitizes only the nun with no forebeard

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If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

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What do you call a black guy who is a lifeguard An African American male who puts his safety before others

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what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

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What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Why can you punish cows but not fish? Because you can ground beef, but not fish!

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I walked into my sister's room and slipped on a bra..........it was a boobie trap

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The FBI

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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what's worst than being gay? being black

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

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Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

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A movie trilogy about an alphabet book. A ten minute long movie about a complete lifespan. A 600 pages long book on how to stop procrastination. A two page book about the top 600 award winning pictures. CALL NOW FOR A TELESCOPE INCLUDED! (So you can see the stars and fuck the book altogether) Juggernaut: IM THE JUGGERNAUTBITCH! Me: Hi, mind if I just call you bitch for short? Your life sucks sometimes because Karma is a bitch... ...My bitch ;)

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

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columbus laid an egg. he was very proud of it, but the other dudes ate it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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