What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket.

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

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Why wasn't the dog obedient? Because it was dead.

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What did the man do when it was raining pineapples? He got a chainsaw and went on a killing spree against his neighbors family.

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Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

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When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her.

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Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

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What is the difference between an African and French person? Nothing all people ate equal.

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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What do you get when you stab a four year old in the chest 57 times A dead body

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They have a lengthy discussion regarding the hardships their people have suffered throughout history. Eventually, the subject changes to which coffee franchise has the best blend. A clear, concise decision is never reached. They then are asked to leave the bar, as they have not ordered any drinks and the bar is for paying customers only.

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columbus laid an egg. he was very proud of it, but the other dudes ate it.

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How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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A woman fell victim to nasty car accident. Her injuries were very grave. The doctors warned her family that she had two hours to live. She died two hours later.

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what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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