Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

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What doesn't kill you makes you injured

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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How do you fit four gays on a barstool? You turn it upside down

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How to have a cheap party in just 5 steps: 1. Buy 100 McDonald's burgers and give everyone food poisoning 2. Bring out that black serial killer's mask you've been working on. 3. Bring out that sharp knife. 4. Slit everyone's throats. 5. Dance.

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

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knock knock who's there? the chicken i just crossed the road to offer you this token of appreciation for helping me screw in a lightbulb

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was dead Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was stapled to the first koala

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What did Hitler say to the Jew? I don't know, I don't speak German.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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Why didn't the boy eat his food? because he wasn't hungry.

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So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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How did the young child react when a bullet went through his head? He fell to the ground and his heart stopped beating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops