- Anti Joke

Yeah sure comment below, and soylent green is fucking people! Moral: "You are judging the spitting image of yourself, except that you are doomed to remain ignorant and judgmental"

heads up!

What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

Once upon a time, a boy sat on a hedgehog. He abruptly stood up, as the spikes had caused him a certain amount of discomfort.

Dissing the bible just 4 lols: Relax chill edition. -First, I have "crossed" the gaza desert ok? It took me seven minutes walking SLOWLY, yet with God as a guide Moses took 40 years? WHY? The desert was generally smaller then! -Eat my body and drink my blood and thy shall live eternally, I admit that eating well such as bread and a bit of wine daily is good for ya, thanks jebus points for you. But is eternity a number in the bible? Or does eating just bread and alcoholic wine truly grant one immortality? Nope sorry impossible. Buuuuuut, if a piece of Jesus brought immortality, then its canibalism, and the bible is meant to be followed to the letter, not symbolically. -Thy shall not steal: Jesus "borrowed" donkeys at random, his peeps asked but isnt that wrong? Jesus answered the lord shall give them a donkey anew. (so give me your car, God shall bring you another, you wont claim your little lord stole and lied huh? -Jesus murdered some tree because it gave him no fruit, you know at wintertime where trees do not bear fruit? Thy shall not kill unless thy are Jesus? -God: Drowned almost all= Worst serial killer ever? -Why do churches "the house of God" need money constantly? Is God that poor? -Only those that hate their mother and father might follow Jesus? While only those that love thieir parents can follow God? Well okay "new" testament is some sort of update like windows I get that... Kinda. .-When Jesus shouted "Father/Lord WHY!" while agonizing on the cross God answered with a lightning bolt? What kinda trucking answer is that? Poor poor Jebus. :( -God makes no mistakes, he just regrets creating humanity his greatest mistake? :( -God had existed forever right? One day he said let there be light, so he spent eternities in total and complete darkness? Aww man! -Why Is Satan the antichrist, he offered Jesus water at the desert, humans crucified tortured and killed him, talk about tossing blame the wrong way. -Humanity created Sin, God had to murder his own son in order to break Sin, do humans have power over God via Sin? -Jesus died in order to prove his immortality, okay, but why all the torture? What did that do? -At one battle the army was led by God holding a sword himself, but they had to retreat once they reached the mountains because the enemy carriages where plated with steel? God lost against steel? Ok Ok... -Jesus said on the cross that he would return, three days later he did, you waiting for his third coming? -The bible was changed by priests for the last time (for now) roughly hundred and fifthy years ago by priests? Why? Priest are to serve God, not to use his power for their own, fuck priest... -God clearly states that one shall not put any God before him, is he admitting that there are others, or that we can believe in others too as long as we dont allow our fait in them to surpass his? -Why is God a jealous God? Why do we follow a dude whose intentions "are shrouded in mystery?" How can THAT be the answer we seek? -Love thy neighbor: Which one? (lol). -Enough for now, except "eat only four legged animals such as the lobster (which has at least six legs, lol)

What is yellow and fluffy? Green fluff, I lied about the yellow part.

Mr Whelk visited his doctor. His doctor put on a sterile glove and inserted two fingers into the man's rectum. "Does this feel all right?" The doctor asked "Yes" replied Mr Whelk. "But is my wrist broken or not?

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he f**king felt like it!

Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

Knock Knock. Who's there? Mark Mark who? Mark Jennings. Oh hey, Mark, come in.

A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

Wanna here a good joke?

Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

yo mama so old she was a waiter at the last supper.

Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS