knock knock get lost!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

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Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

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Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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Knock knock! who's there? Excuse me sir can I have a moment to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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there was a guy who wanted to be bad and have bitches but he died from all the smoking and drinking and went to hell for eternal damnation

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A blode takes a trip to her favorite restaurant. She arrives safely. After consuming a delicious meal she dies of cancer.

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its snowing on mount fuji

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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What's the best type of silence in a family? None, all families should be open in communication.

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What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

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How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

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When you hit an animal Realize your out of your mind Then realize the animals mind is over there in the ditch.

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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hello juliano and guss. having fun?

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

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the WNBA

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Help iv fallen and i can get up -blarg

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops