Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

Cinema summer shits coming this year! Reboot edition ONE! Rocky BarBoler a older man with dreams of becoming a true boxing champion!... but will he succeed against the champion Apollo thirteen? Watch ROCKY To find out. Starring Mike Tyson as Rocky, and Justin Bieber as Apollo thirteen (Do I need remind you Rocky lost in his first movie?, Well that one is for you "Beleibers" because in the end you are misguided cuties.. most way to young for me, but you are as cute as you are silly). Moral: Loves cute girls... especially those over 16... legal age here... good luck calling us all pedophiles... They mature fast here, "beliebe" me, twelve year olds have fully grown boobs... what did you think I meant by cute? RAWR! Look but no touch is a okay for me mama Luigi. I just tend to call me once they turn 16...

Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

Women Sports.

What does the name Joe mean? Joe Mama! Egit

Why does Frank hate Jim? He killed his son.

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

police are looking for max 'cheesehead' harrison

an indian woman works at seven eleven. this is because her son has one leg and she needs to pay pay for all the medical needs.

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

Roses are black, Violets are black, and I'm blind .

Why did my mom smell bad. Because she is a corpse and has been dead for some days now

yo mama so fat she decided to go on a diet :)

This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

Why did the man starve to death? Because his wife died

"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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