I like to slap biitches, I like to slap hoes

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He payed for his drinks, tipped the bar tender, drank a few too many so he got a cab home.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

thumb_up thumb_down +11

WHO WANTS SOW????

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the irishman go to the bar? because he was a designated driver and was picking up his friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: why did the blind man walk off the bridge? A: because he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

MAGHBERRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why does the St. Johns River flow north? Because Georgia Sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the black guy get kicked out of the bar? He was riding a jack hammer

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the black guy eat KFC? Cause he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

its all aodhan

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The dinosaurs aren't really extinct. Just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops