A man visits his doctor for an annual checkup. "Doc, I feel great! I'm running 5 miles a day, I just got promoted at work, and sex with my wife has never been better!" A few weeks later, his doctor calls him in. When he arrives, the doctor looks at him grimly. "I have some bad news. You have lung cancer." "But how? I don't smoke. My wife doesn't smoke. I have never felt better." The doctor pats him on the back, reassuringly. "This may be true, but you still have lung cancer."

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what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

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What's black and white and red all over? Two biracial gay guys boning a can of paint...

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more chocolate?

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Why did Jimmy cry? His mom raped him.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. He orders a beer and a mop.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Whose there? Person 1: Frank Person 2: Oh, hey man. Come on in.

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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canada

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"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

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What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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Adam Claypool walks into a bar. He immediately sucks the bartender's dick because he is the biggest queer anyone has ever seen

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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What did the grape do after it was stepped on? Nothing, as it was incapacitated, and even under normal circumstances, it would be incapable of performing any voluntary actions as it is only a grape.

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run farther?

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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a pornstar comes early to a party

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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whats the difference between justin beiber and a gay guy? both guys and girls like gay guys

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? To get to the other side.

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What is invisible and smells like cheese? Cheese. I lied about the invisible part, because cheese is not invisible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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