I have a friend named David. He then lost his ID, now we called him Dav

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

Are you a tree

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

How to make Ramen like a boss Step 1: get a promotion

How many fingers do most people have? 10

If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

Did you hear about the eskimo and the pregnant lady? The eskimo got the pregnant lady pregnant.

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

If Daniel has 3 concaved man boobs, and Isabelle has 13 homosexual friends, what is the ratio of dolphins to African rapists? Wenis, because Jimmy was raped last night.

why did the chicken cross the road? becasue he wanted to. also he didnt want to be involved in the holocost

What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

Okay okay, its not like I wanted a serious answer anyway, bye!

Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

What did the fly say to the frog? Nothing, insects can't talk.

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

Q: what do you call a black priest A: Coley s**t

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...