Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

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If you're having Kony problems, I feel bad for you son. He's stolen 99 kids and your posters saved none.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

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Women's rights

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

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Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

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Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

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Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

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Q: What happened when Paul couldn't decide on Pornhub or Redtube. A: nothing since he doesn't have a d***

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Q: Why didn't the little boy get his bike for christmas? A: He died from cancer

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

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Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

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Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

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i knew this one arab, who was so arab that there was nothing funny about him

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. *knock knock* -Who's there? -Not Suzy.

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Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Stealth baseballs record

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Dude: Hey want to hear a joke? Other dude: What is it? Dude: Joke. Other dude: What? Dude: I don't know. That was a joke ladies an gentleman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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