roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

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What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

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Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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What's Brown and dirty? Dirt

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Why is NO ONE on Facebook when I AM?! Because you have no friends... on Facebook... ... Wow.

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Why does it take women to cum slower than men? Who cares

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Why is Islam the fastest growing religion? Because black people breed like rats.

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Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

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Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

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what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

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Women's rights

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why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

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Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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If you're having Kony problems, I feel bad for you son. He's stolen 99 kids and your posters saved none.

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Q: What happened when Paul couldn't decide on Pornhub or Redtube. A: nothing since he doesn't have a d***

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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