A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

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Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

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How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

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Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

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Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

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A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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1: What do you call your car door when it's opened slightly? 2: I don't know. What? 1: Ajar! 2: A jar? 1: No. Ajar. 2: But it's a door. 1: Just forget it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

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What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

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Lets Go Lakers!

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"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

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How do you get 100 Jews in a car? It is physically impossible to fit 100 full grown homosapians into a vehicle, therefore it will not work.

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Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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