When I get aroused I get a solid snake

What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

Alex Gedrose.

knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

Why did my mom smell bad. Because she is a corpse and has been dead for some days now

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke again? Bubbles was the girl next door, Jonny raped her.

A black man walks into a bar The bartender tells him they don't serves blacks The black mans calls the Police and the bartender is arrested for Discrimination

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

You know what's the least funniest part about cancer? I am about to die in about a month or so.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

Why did the chicken smoke weed? Because he was black

You so dumb that you weighed 100 pounds and ate a peanut and weighed 500 pounds!

A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

What is the last digit of Pi? Pi is an infinite decimal sequence, and therefore has no last number, but if it did, it would presumably be somewhere from 0-9.

Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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