What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

A baby seal walks into a club.

How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

What is worse than eating shoxy poulet.? Nothing

Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

the love boat

Knock knock. Who's there It's Jim O ok come on in

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

This is not a joke

Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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