Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

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What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

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Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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What did the fish say when it was being fried? That's crazy, fish can't talk.

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Fishing rods are cool This haiku does not make sense Lumpy Space Princess

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Why did Sally cross the street? Because someone was gonna rape her if she didn't.

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What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

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How do you know when a bag of chips is stale? It is past the expiration date.

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What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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Q: What's the answer to this question? A: The question to this answer.

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the asian kid gets an F

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2 guys get into a fight over a girl.....the girl walks out

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Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than The Holocaust? TEN HOLOCAUSTS? What's worse then TEN HOLOCAUSTS? THE END OF THE WORLD

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the batmobile? Robin, get in the batmobile

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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Whats black and hangs from the my tree? A tire swing.

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what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

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Justin Becnel falls off a tree, what happens? He breaks his neck and unfortunately dies.

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Person 1: Hey Person 2: What's up? Person 1: Kill Yoself Person 2: Alright

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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