Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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call of duty world at war

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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How did the black man get a new television? He worked hard and put away a small percentage of his weekly wage in order to save for this new addition to his household.

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Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

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What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

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Are you a tree? No.

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A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops