Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

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Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

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Why was there a black man and a white man in a bar? Due to the probability of this occurance happening due to percentages of black/white people in a bar, this specific situation should be of no shock, in fact it is a completely normal occurance one of which should not be questioned

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Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

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The man asks the blind man "where ya going"b The Blind man replies "i dont know".

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What was big and stiff A 30cm ruler

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Roses are red Violets are blue The more you know

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Wife says to husband, who works is programmer, "Honey get out of bed there is a bug in the bed". Husband says "ok."

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How do you save a black man from drowning? I don't know GOOD!

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Elizabeth Warren

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So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

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Why did the homeless man kill his dog? Because a drunk rich guy said he'd pay him a hundred dollars if he did.

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What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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Netflix and chill

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops