What's brown and dirty? Dirt.

what happened to the kid who didn't get what he wanted for his birthday? He committed suicide

Q: Why did the Japanese man fall off the cliff? A: He was pushed

Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

What god did Bill believe in? No god, Bill is an athiest

Roses are red, violets are blue, your hair smells nice, especially when woven into a sweater.

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

Is your refrigerator running? no then your food is probably beginning to rot

Q: Why doesn't the young lady speak very much? A: Because she's a whore

Why did the mexican order a bean burrito? Because thats his favorite

why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

A middle-aged white woman is walking toward a building, talking on her cellphone to a friend. She says, "Yes, I can meet you for lunch in a few hours. I have to go to the unemployment office to sign up for benefits. It's going to be horrible. It'll probably be full of black people." Standing in line, she is incredibly uncomfortable and horrified, because there is a black man right behind her, and she is stuck standing next to him for a long time. Finally it's her turn, and she steps up to the counter. The clerk asks her, "And what did you do for a living?" She answers, "I mopped the floors and cleaned the bathroom in a Blockbuster store that closed down." The clerk says, "Fill out this paperwork and take it to window #2." As she turns around, she is once more repulsed by the black man who is standing right there. Now that it's his turn, he steps to the counter, and the clerk asks him, "And what did you do for a living?" He answers, "I was the senior vice president of global strategic development for Eastman Kodak."

Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

Whis a racist rapist etter than a non-racist rapist? less women getting raped

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin said "Wow, its hot in here." The other muffin said "Oh my gosh a talking muffin!" The house burnt down because the oven created a fire.

Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

Why did the Mexican cross the road? The light was green.

Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

A Boy Walks Up To A Frog At the Bus Stop And Says, “Why Are You So Upset?” And The Frog Replied, “I’m Waiting For The Bus Because My Car Just Got TOAD!”

How many women does it take to drive a car? One. She had a sex change.

Why did the kid fall off his swing? Because his mum threw a fridge at him.

What is the difference between a black man and a sofa? A black man is a human being with feelings, while a sofa is an inanimate object that people sit on in order to enjoy comfort and possibly watch television.

Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested? He was found guilty of two acts of murder in the first degree.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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