Why did the chicken crossed yo mama? Because your moms a man and your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

falling didnt make the difference

Teacher- And that is why the Pythagorean theorem only works for RIGHT triangles. Any questions? Student- I like grapes.

Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

a man walks in to a bar he says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey laugh" so he goes in there and makes it laugh and gets a free beer ant then the next day he goes in and says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey cry" so he goes in there and makes the horse cry and the bartender says " i will give you a free beer but first tell me what you did to make my donkey laugh and cry" the man says " first to make the donkey laugh i told the donkey i had a bigger penis than him then to make him cry i showed him

How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

A fish swims into a wall. It does not say anything, seeing as fish do not possess vocal chords and therefore are incapable of speech.

What's worse than finding a hair in your soup? Slavery.

A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

What is stupid? I would say you but these jokes are worse.

What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

drugs.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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