A muslim walks into a bomb store. He is a police officer and quickly arrests the owners of the store because of the obvious legal violations.

An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

5 people are walking

Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

"knock knock" "Come in"

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

Why is the chicken dead? It tried to cross the road.

What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

Q: What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? A: A set of Legos

What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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