A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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Whats the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have a Bar Mitzvah in Holocaust Germany.

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Ask me if i am a tree? "Are you a tree" No.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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I dont usually get jokes, but when i do I get them.

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What's the difference between a pen and a tiger? Believe it or not they are both not a cantaloupe.

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what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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what has 2 legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

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A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Mitt Romney's economic plan for America.

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roses are red violets are blue that's just the way god made them

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why does column have a letter n?

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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WHY DO JEWS HATE GERMANY? THEY DON'T THEY FORGAVE THE NAZIS :-) ( . )( . ) -------

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

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k

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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Did you hear about the little girl who got a bike for her birthday? Shes dying of Terminal Cancer

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Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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