what happens when you and a 6 foot black guy get stuck on an island? hang him by a tree and make shelter

My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

Whats Do You call people, on the top floor of a Double-Decker bus? Passengers

Why did the little boy get food poisoning? Because his family can't afford to buy organic food, and can only afford McDonald's burgers, where their cows are forced to stand in their own feces.

So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

Why the bird can't fly? Because i cutt off his wings.

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

I walked into my sister's room and slipped on a bra..........it was a boobie trap

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

lipstick pig

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

Why did Moses part the sea Because it was divisible by 2

"who you calling pinhead" tell me you know what thats off

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

Knock, Knock Who's there? The FBI

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

Why did Peter go to the dentist? Because he had to go to the dentist!

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Why do pokemon have hair? because they have no balls

What do you call a bunny with a knife in his chest? Emo

What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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