How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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A Muslim man walks away from a populated area leaving his briefcase behind. After a few minutes he returns because he forgot his briefcase.

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Xzibit

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

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If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

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a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

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what does a granny look best in? 1950

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Why do girls not have penises? Because there girls

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you and your family will die tonight

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong, though. It's Hambone.

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What did the janitor have for breakfast? Food

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life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

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A man walked into a bar. He broke his nose.

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An overzealous adventurer takes a trip to the Congo in Central Africa. While exploring the dense jungles, he accidentally drinks water that is contaminated with a very rare virus. He lives through the pain of the virus for many years. About 10 years after his trip to Africa, researchers discover a cure for the adventurer's virus. He goes to the clinic to get his shot to kill the virus. Exhilarated, the now cured adventurer runs out of the clinic but fails to look both ways while crossing the street and gets hit by and ambulance and dies.

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Whats better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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69

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A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

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What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

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Christopher Walken steps into a bar.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops