why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

Two Irish men walks out of a bar

What about all the bullshit comments? The spamming?

Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

whats white and looks like paper paper

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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