Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

What's brown, no one likes and has had a bad history? Dog poop

Roses are read Vilots are blue, I have a gun, Now get out of my house!!!

Whats the worst thing about walking through a meadow of dead babies My boner

A woman walks into a bar.

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

42, that is all

How did Princess Diana cross the road? Through the windshield

What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

Send "What Makes You Beautiful" Ringtone to your CellShowHideSong Notes - Go behind the words! You're insecure, don't know what for You're turning heads when you walk through the do-o-or Don't need make-up - to cover up Being the way that you are is eno-o-ough Everyone else in the room can see it Everyone else but you Baby you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed the way you smile at the ground, it ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! If only you saw what I could see you'd understand why I want you so desperatley Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! Read more: ONE DIRECTION - WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL LYRICS http://www.metrolyrics.com/what-makes-you-beautiful-lyrics-one-direction.html#ixzz1sJdk3KHD Copied from MetroLyrics.com

If a man is alone in the woods and there is no one there to tell he's wrong is he right? If a tree falls on a women.... Before we tell the rest why was there a tree I the kitchen?

how do you get your son or daughters attention? break down the door to their room and promptly begin beating them with a wooden baseball and then tie them up to a chair and torture them for 24 hours.

An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? The baby is not a car.

What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

I don't think Holocaust jokes are funny, Anne Frankly I find them offensive.

Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

What do you call a penguin in the desert? A penguin.

Roses are red.. Your child is also red.. I drove my car over his face. <3

Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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