Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I said so.

what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

dick dick dick... frogs

How do you kill Chuck Norris. Shoot him in the face

a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

Why do all the Republicans hate Obama? He's a Democrat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could be slaughtered and eaten for dinner.

What do you call a gathering of Asians? A chinkfest

why did Kelsey fall off the swing? because she has no arms Knock Knock who's there? not Kelsey

What do 9 out of 10 people like? Gang rape.

Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

A dying man walked into a shop and started to look at the clothing on display. Then he died.

Why can't Tommy ride his bicycle? Because Tommys' bike has a missing pedal.

A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

Hey. I have to ask you a serious question. Okay. what? You can only answer with yes or no. Okay what is it? Do your parents know your gay? .....

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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