Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

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Knock Knock. Did someone outside the front door just say "Knock Knock"?

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why is blake oneal gay? because hes black and he likes peniss in his ass

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Do you like fish-sticks? Love 'em. You like putting fish-sticks in your mouth? Yeah. What are you, a gay fish?

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Whats worse than 2 holocausts? 2 and one tenth of a holocaust

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I'm on the ABC diet. The ABC stands for: Americans British Chinese I eat humans.

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A elementary school child was waiting at the bus stop for the bus to come. All of the sudden, the bus comes around the corner, pulls up, stops and he gets in.

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Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the indian man say to the black man? "Hi."

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

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Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

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I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

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who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

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Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

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Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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