A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

In Soviet Russia you drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up.

Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

penispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenis

Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

Roses come in a variety of colors.

Why was the sex offender sweating in the playground? Because he was pushing his over weight son on the swing.

If a quiz is a quizical then what is a test? an Exam.

Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

knock knock who's there peedo peedo who scissors

A man with Alztheimers walks into a bar. He forgets the purpose of being there.

Paper shield.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Why did the Billy flunk the test? His parents were killed in a refridgerator

I drive a 'rarri

So it was 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar......I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ended up getting nuked

what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

What did the guy at the office order on his pizza. Pepperoni :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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