Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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Queens Park rangers

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how many black people are... wait stereotypical jokes are for fags

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How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

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Womens' sports

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People Order Our Patties

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Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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How many batteries does it take to run a car 1 a car battery

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get hit by a car

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a disabled person walked into a bar..oh wait

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A small plane is flying across the Atlantic Ocean, on board there's a Black Guy, a Jew, a Priest, and a Mexican. The plane has engine failure and needs to crash, but luckily there are enough parachutes for everyone. The evacuation is succesful.

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what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

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My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

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a pornstar comes early to a party

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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