Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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ded on boomer and aodddan

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Why was baby Johnny crying because a monkey came and ripped of his dick

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What do you call a stupid anti-joke? Stupid.

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What do you call a 46 year old man with one eye 4'5 and has one arm coming out of his chest Steve

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Q:Why didn't Mr. Fuzzy have to cut his hair anymore? A: Because he was diagnosed with cancer

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What's better than Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels Jr.

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If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

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Whats so funny? That kid has down syndrome

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In the middle of a long flight from Heathrow to Chicago O'Hare, the passengers of a 747 watched the engines all suddenly flame out. "Now, folks," the captain said over the PA as the plane plummeted to the earth, "I want it on record that I said it in plain English: a 747 can't fly from Heathrow to Chicago without refueling." No one bothered writing it down.

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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A hermaphrodite walks into a bakery, orders an eclair, then leaves.

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

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whats 69+2? 71

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

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Why did little tommy fall in the well. Because he grew tired of his life of brutal Beatings and starvation, so he jumped.

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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What are the two things that the little boy with cancer wants for Christmas? He wants his cancer to go away. He also wants the new Halo game.

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why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

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one day a boy was in his bed he woke up and stepped on his carpet,he then got out a bowl and some breakfast, 23 minutes later the boy rode to school on his bike and parked it in a bike room, he then sat down at his seat and pulled out his history book and waited for Mr Jonty Nicholls to finish his coffee so he could learn about hitler.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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