How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

why did the man leave the restaurant? because he was done with his meal

Lil' Wayne

A man walks into a bar.

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

How do you make a little girl laugh. You tell her something funny.

No one walks into a bar... because it was closed.

A man named Jack has three kids. The oldest is named Jordan, the middle one is named Kim, and the youngest is named Alex. One day Jordan walked up to his father and asked him how his day was. His father replied, "It was fine."

What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

What did the German say the the Jewish man? "Hello, nice to meet you."

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

What did the people say to each other when they ate the orange? Orange you glad I didn't eat you:) HAHAHAA orange you glad that I am good at telling jokes!

Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

Why did the elephant fall on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall in the hot chocolate!

Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

anti jokes are for fags

School

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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