Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

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Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

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Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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Whats, red, blue, green, yellow, feels like popcorn, looks like jello, tastes like hydrogen peroxide and smells like burning logs? i dont know. i was asking you

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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what is worse than finding a worm in your apple being tricked by your best friend to mule drugs over the boarder and then imprisoned in a Vietnamese jail, where you will most likely will be traded for sex and other horrid act of sodomy, only to escape and work as a sex slave to earn your way home, because that is the life you know now there is no way out you will die here.

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Some black guy grabs a white guys wallet. the black guy says " hey I think you dropped this"

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Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Are you one of those gay rapists that flame around telling people no all the time?

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A woman walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, my water just broke." The doctor replies "Get off my carpet."

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What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like to rhyme Microwave.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Tell her something that doesn't make any sense at all.

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What is white black and Chinese A panda

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This is a joke setup.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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